Obedience.
So often we have such negative emotions and connotations associated with this word.
It feels suppressive and submissive. It can make us feel helpless and like everything is out of our control. It feels very contrary to the culture the world has prioritized today.
The more I experience it in God's Hands though, the more it feels like freedom.
I've been drowning in my own stress trying to consider a major, life-changing decision the last few weeks.
There are two (maybe three) doors and I don't know which one to choose. OR maybe there are doors I haven't even considered. Heaven help me.
I've prayed and asked God to show me which door.
But I'm not a good listener. I haven't perfected discernment. I've barely crossed the threshold into the realm of what could be considered proper discernment.
I'll pray and ask, and I'll think God is telling me to go a certain way or do a certain thing, but then I think "but what if I'm wrong?" What if I only think that's what he wants, because that's what I want or what if that's just a coincidence and not actually God's plan?
How can I possibly even begin to try to know or understand God's mind or plan for my life?
I can't.
But God can.
He can overcome my overthinking. He can break through the walls I've built out of fear. He can shine light through the darkness of my unknowns.
He asks one thing, and he'll take care of the rest.
Obedience.
Even if you don't know how. Or where to start. Even if you're scared or unsure. Even if you're overwhelmed and drowning. Even if you make the wrong decision because you can't hear or can't see.
ESPECIALLY then.
Obedience.
He doesn't need your plan B. He doesn't need your escape plan or fallout shelter. He doesn't need your what ifs or how comes.
Just your obedience. Your trust that he knows all that, he's got all that, and he's bringing you safely through it all with Him.
In my darkest hours, when I don't know.. I just don't know. I bet in the last 2 weeks, I've said "I don't know," 1100 times. When you just don't know, God does, and if you just throw it at his feet, and say, "I can't."
He can. He will.
It doesn't mean it's the safe way, or that it's the easy or scenic way. It can be soo hard. To just let go. To loosen your grip and trust that God literally has got you. To put that figurative faith into literal action. It's hard and scary.
God knows there are challenges and mountains.
But God's way will bring you greater gifts, greater joy than you could ever imagine.
"For truly I tell you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you."
God can do that. God WANTS to do that. If you submit to him. Give up your control. Give up your plan B.
And it's the greatest freedom and the greatest peace you'll ever know.